“When you choose the behavior, you also choose the consequence that is attached to that action.”
I originally posted this when I first entered the world of blogging about a year and a half ago. It seemed to resonate with many readers, so I am bringing it back again. I have since added a picture. In my early days of blogging, I had no idea how to do such a thing. (Until Todd Lohenry discovered this post and taught me a lot of what I know today about the blogging world.)
Here goes…
First, look at the consequences and decide. Is this what I really want?
My dad once told me, “Remember what you know.” Through the years, I have found this to be great advice. So many times we forget simple truths in life, things that we already know. Often, I write about these simple truths to not only remind my readers, but to also remind myself of things that we already know and may have forgotten to practice in our lives.
Today I write about choices.
Every choice that we make is followed by a consequence. Too often, we act impulsively, not taking the time to think through the possible repercussions of our actions. We do not play the tape through, which means that we do not visualize the backlash of our thoughts and behaviors. We simply act without thinking it through in its totality.
Whether our choices are impulsive or well thought out, the consequences will be the same. Take the time to play the tape through. The choices we make when emotions are high, we usually come to regret. Take a moment to think it all the way through.
Obvious things that we forget:
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When you eat three pieces of chocolate cake, you choose to gain weight. How bad do you want the cake?
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When you choose to stay up too late, you choose to be tired the next day. Do you want to be tired?
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When you choose to drink too much alcohol, you choose a hangover or worse. Is this what you really want?
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When you choose to show up late for work three days in a row, you choose to lose your job. Do you want your job?
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When you choose to blow off the test, you choose to fail it. Do you want to fail your class?
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When you choose to eat unhealthy foods, you choose to be unhealthy. Do you want to be unhealthy?
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When you choose to give up exercise, you choose to be out of shape. Do you want to be unhealthy and out of shape?
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When you choose to tell off your boss, you choose to be fired. Do you want to be fired?
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When you choose to neglect your relationships, you choose to feel isolated. Do you want to be alone?
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When you choose to be pessimistic, you choose to be unhappy. Do you want to be unhappy?
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When you choose to lie, you choose to be doubted. Do you want to be doubted?
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When you choose to be kind, you choose to have friends. Do you want friends?
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When you choose to love others, you choose to be loved. Do you want to be loved?
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When you choose to respect yourself, you choose to be respected by others. Do you want others to respect you?
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When you choose to seek support, you choose to put an end to your isolation. Do you want companionship?
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When you choose to make your behaviors match your values, you choose to have peace. Do you want peace?
- When you choose to step out of your comfort zone, you choose to grow and live more abundantly. Do you want to live more abundantly?
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When you choose to think that you can, you choose to be successful. Do you want to succeed?
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When you choose to follow your goals with action, you choose to accomplish them. Do you want to accomplish goals?
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When you choose to love yourself, you choose to love others? Do you want to love others?
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When you choose to be honest, you choose to be trusted. Do you want to be trusted?
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When you choose to work hard, you choose the rewards. Do you want certain rewards?
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When you choose to be grateful, you choose to be fulfilled. Do you want to feel fulfilled?
You are in control of your choices and with this comes great power and freedom.
Think it through!
Related book:
Life Strategies by Phillip C. McGraw. Ph.D
Love it!
Hanna, Thank you for reading and commenting.
I parented my son through use of knowing the consequences. Then if he broke the rules and had to write sentences or be grounded, I made sure to call it ‘consequences’ instead of punishment. And if he complained, I reminded him that I didn’t choose it – he did. It worked and he is a responsible young man. Great piece here. Very thoughtful.
Thank you for commenting. I use this approach with my children too.
Thanks for the link Kristin. BTW – I followed you on Twitter, too.
It is so hard for me to get this simple truth through to my students. It is nearing the end of the term and those who chose not to come to class, do homework, etc, just chose their grade.
I think that many people want to do whatever they please and somehow make the circumstances go away.
I like you better than Dr. Phil 🙂
You are so funny. In hindsight, I wished I had used one of my own quotes too. Thank you for the Twitter follow and the kind words on Facebook. Maybe your students will connect the dots. Have a great evening.
Isn’t it funny how we all will quote someone famous rather than ourselves just because they are famous? I never posted one of my own quotes but I post at least one per day of a famous person.
Dr. Phil is canned for TV. You are real. Fresh is always better than canned.
Have a good evening. Enjoy the weather.
I agree. Thanks
I am so thankful that I came across this post today! Due to being very tired, (because I chose to stay up late), I almost made a really bad choice today and I’ve been looking for a solid sign to motivate me to either just do it or not do it. Your post was my sign. I choose to wait to take action and continue to build my skills because I want to show up being able to do the best I can. Great post!
Thank you for your comment. There are exceptions, but most of the time it is better to make a decision when you have had time to really think it through, rather than when you are really tired or upset. Think on it when you are rested and calm unless you are in a dangerous situation.
Great thoughts. My favorite – When you choose to lie, you choose to be doubted – this is one I have drilled into my kids! Me, well, I choose to be tired…a lot!
Thank you for your comments. I tell my kids the same thing.
Good morning, Kristin. Because you are an early riser, you already know the good news, but I’d like to share it with your readers as well.
You have been nominated for the 3-in-1 blogger award. I follow this blog regularly and I also often see your great insight on comments on other blogs that I follow. We are so many times on the same page with our advice. You truly inspire me and I wanted to show my appreciation for what you do.
You can claim your award at http://living4bliss.wordpress.com/2012/03/17/and-the-winners-are/
Thank you so much. I am truly honored.
You are very welcome. Enjoy your award.
Love this! Reality bites. Sadly, I can relate to a lot of those! Thanks for the reminders!
Thank you so much for reading and commenting.
This entire post is full of truths…so great to see it being talked about…many are lost in the consequences and turmoils of their own decisions and don’t know where to begin to fix it….super reminders…
Celeste
Thank you!
This is outstanding Kristin. I’m going to reblog it and send people your way. This is quite good. Thanks for writing!
Thank you so much. I really appreciate the reblog and sending your readers in my direction. I look forward to reading more of your posts.
Reblogged this on The Upside and commented:
I was delighted to find Kristin Barton Cuthriell’s outstanding blog today. This post was so good, I had to reblog. If you read often here at The Upside, the concept of taking personal responsibility looms both large and often. Kristin takes this to fantastic levels. Check out her site: http://www.letlifeinpractices.com
Thank you so much.
Thank you for this reminder! It is so easy to make the same mistake over and over again and for some strange reasons, expecting a different outcome! I have done that with foods which I deeply know do not make me feel good. And I have always suffered from the same outcome. I love your dad comment: “Remember what you know”. I will use his wise words. Thank you for sharing. Love xxx
Thanks Stephanie!
thank you for sharing this. glad i stumbled upon your blog…
So wise and true and… obvious! And yet we all need to hear it all the time, again and again. Thanks.
I agree with everything that you said. It is amazing how often we forget to practice what we know. I really do need daily reminders for obvious things. Thank you for reading and commenting!
What people do and say, tell us whether they are to be trusted.
This is what I teach children.
Very thought provoking article.’ You are in control of your choices and with this comes great power and freedom, very true. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for all of your comments and for following my blog.
i enjoyed reading through. And also remembered that one compromise paves way for hundred
Yes!
David, Thank you for your recent post about my post. I am glad that you liked it. Have a get day. It is amazing how often we all forget what we already know.
Todd, Thank you so much for the reblog and for sending people my way. I am looking forward to reading more of your blog. I am now following you. Thank you again. Sometimes we do forget the obvious.