Do you respect yourself? Do your know your worth? How well do you treat yourself? By suggesting that you treat yourself with kindness, I am not suggesting that you become selfish. I am not telling you to put your needs in front of the needs of others. And I am certainly not advising you to act in an arrogant way, dismissing others as not as important as you. Quite the contrary.
I am suggesting that you become aware of how you treat yourself. Not only for your benefit, but for the benefit of others in your life. When you are unkind to yourself, those who love you will also suffer.
Below you will find questions that will increase your awareness as you inventory how well you treat you. Ask yourself…
- Do I treat myself well physically, mentally, spiritually, and socially?
- Do I eat healthy foods?
- Do I get enough rest?
- Am I exercising?
- Can I accept my physical appearance?
- Do I have the courage to leave an abusive relationship?
- Do I spend time with people who are loving and compassionate?
- Can I stop myself from becoming verbally or physically abusive to others?
- Can I view mistakes as opportunities to grow?
- Do I know that I am likable?
- Do I get regular check ups at the dentist and the doctor’s office?
- Do I believe that I am lovable?
- Do I appreciate my abilities?
- Do I consider my own spiritual needs?
- Do I know that it is okay to be wrong?
- Can I accept my limitations?
- Do I hang around emotionally healthy people?
- Do I enjoy my own company?
- Do I accept the possibility that I may be a kind and loving person?
- Do I allow myself to have flaws and still know that I am worthy and lovable?
- Do I take time to have fun?
- Can I name qualities that I like about myself?
- Am I capable of having loving relationships with others?
If you answered no to several of these questions, I want you to know that you are not being kind enough to yourself. Your self-worth begins with you. You CAN change the way in which you perceive yourself. You really do create your own reality. Others will better respect you, when you respect yourself. Other people don’t define your value as a person. You do have worth! Your only problem may be that you don’t recognize it.
It is time to wake up and experience the excellence in you that has been there all along!
If deep feelings of shame get in your way and cause you to self-sabotage, you may really benefit from professional counseling to gain a new perspective. Maybe you have beaten yourself up long enough.
Related articles
- CULTIVATE: Compassion and Curiosity (maitripsychology.com)
- How Do I Love Myself? (borntoinspire.com)
- How Self-Compassion Will Help You Eat Better (and Some Other Stuff) (eatingmindful.com)
Reblogged this on Wholeheartedness and commented:
Hear, hear…
You inspired this post. Thank you so much for sharing it.
Friends and something more. Friends care about each other, they inquire about their wellness, activities have some concern and interest. When there is no interest from the friend you consider to be your closest deepest connection,you value above all others,.the question is, not what’s wrong with him? But where is my self respect? Why do I continue to engage when there so little given in return? I have answered all your questions with ‘yes’ except one. It is the purpose of this comment.
Good for you! All “yes” and working on the “no”.
Hi, I reblogged this with my answers. I guess I’ve got some work to do…. Thank you so much for writing this post.
Thank you for sharing this with your readers. I went over to your sight and saw your quiz. I always say that you can’t change anything until you know what you need to change. Good for you!
Great article — I shared it on our Facebook page.
Thank you so much for sharing it. I hope that it helps many.
Great questions. Things to think about.
Yes. Thank you!
Thanks for this, friend 🙂 Appreciate you. Have a good day.
Brian- You are so welcome and I appreciate you, too. Thank you! 🙂
One thing I find hardest, is that my man doesn’t believe in my diagnosed (6yrs ago) condition of Cyclothymia. I feel unlovable to him when I am experiencing a manic or defensive or depressed episode. It seriously impacts my self-worth and whenever I get empowered and give myself permission to believe in myself it comes across arrogant and irrational. He loves me and doesn’t deserve to be on the end of my episodes but my concern is that if he doesn’t believe in my condition one day he may get sick of it & me entirely. I adore your site and would appreciate your advice. (I would usually take this to therapy but I have been unable to leave my bed for two weeks from illness which is aggravating my condition) Would love to hear your ideas on this. Thanks Kristin Blessings to you!
You are so sweet, and I am so sorry that you have not been feeling well. As you know, the mind and body are connected and physical illness will impact the mood. Cyclothymia is a mood disorder and a very real condition. Although there are things that you can do to improve the condition, it is very real. Mood Disorders don’t make people unlovable- and that goes for you, too. When you believe in yourself are you sure it comes across as arrogant and irrational or have you just heard that from one person? You fear your husband will get sick of you. Are you worried he will one day leave you? Hopefully he will never do that, but if he did- it sure wouldn’t define you. Have you told your husband about your fears? Has he gone with you to your therapist? Lots of questions. I am glad that you find my blog helpful. Continue to do everything that you have learned to do to help your condition. And remember NOBODY and NO MOOD DISORDER defines you. Tell your husband that you are grateful when he does support you. Let him know that although he is not responsible for your condition, his support helps you in many ways.
Thank you so much for your advice. It means so much to me. The illness that has had me bed ridden has meant that I have been put on large doses of progesterone and of course the side effects are all highly emotional and exhausting, when you add that to my illness and my mental health issues it is not surprising that I am experience an increase of episodes. I feel arrogant and irrational and by his defensive reactions I believe it to be true. I am not worried that he will leave me but that he will disconnect emotionally from me when I need him most. (Although there have always been underlying issues of insecurity and lack of support since my parents separated when I was a child and I did not see my Dad for 15 years) I have told him my fears and I think his own issues make him blame himself for not knowing how to help me, and all he knows to protect himself from that is to put up his own emotional walls (which he denies doing). He went once with me to therapy at the very beginning and it was good but that was a long time ago and mainly for my initial car phobia. I am hoping to find a new therapist closer to home specifically for us and helping him understand my condition and how he can support me through it (I am not sure how keen he will be to go though). Your time is valuable to me I am so grateful for you taking the time to reply and consider my dilemma. Blessings to you!
Thank you for sharing my article “How Do I Love Myself?” It was truly kind and thoughtful of you!
Sending you much love and light,
Barbara
Great Article. The questionnaire is more useful and appropriately drafted too.
In fact, one has to examine self rather than to finding what others.